Recently I have had a few nights of trouble sleeping and during these times my mind has been so busy, which I believe to have been the cause of the sleeping trouble. Anyway during one of these times it came to mind about my anxiety over calling people for things. Most of the time I try to call someone about things, like if we need to find a plumber or electrician, when I make the call I always end up forgetting things I need to ask. This has caused me not to like to make a lot of calls.
Well the other night as I was thinking about these things, it dawned on me that it is even deeper than having anxiety over calling for things. Honestly I do not like to make most kinds of phone calls. I just do not have a desire to talk to people on the phone.
I realized that when I was younger even if I was to be on the phone with someone there was not a lot I would say. Mostly because I do not like to be on the phone. In all of the years I have been around my preferred method of talking to other people was either face to face or by writing to them.
It has been a strange realization for me, but I have always felt that in some ways I would have fit better in a time when there was no phones to be calling people on. Even now that I have a cell phone and can call someone anytime I wish I do not find that I have a desire to do so.
I do not know if there is a reason for me hating to call people on the phone, but maybe there is no deeper reasoning for it at all and I just hate using phones.
It is nothing personal to anyone that I do not call, or answer a phone call from you, but calling people and talking over the phone is just not my thing. I truthfully would rather talk to someone face to face then call them on the phone. I find this all a little strange, but have come to realize that when we try to figure ourselves out there are some strange things in all of us.
While I am not sure this is something I want to get over or even have anything to do with this that needs to be gotten over, or if this is just something I have to live with forever. I do know that it has been a long time that I have been this way. As I stated before I remember talking to and with people on the phone, but most of those times I was just on the phone with them and did not do a lot of talking as a teenager.
Not only do I most of the time find I have not much to say while on the phone, but sometimes I have that problem even when trying to text someone or write to them.
Over the last couple of years I have found I have a problem at times expressing myself and the things that I am trying to get across to people. While I am not sure what I can do for this, I do need to figure out how to deal with this aspect of interactions. I know that anytime I am put on the spot my brain tends to start shutting down and any thoughts I may have had at one point on a given subject will just leave at the moment I am trying to get them across.
I feel that this can only get to be a bigger problem as I age and possibly lose the ability to remember things. While I will try to figure out ways to keep that from happening for myself, I know that I cannot control every aspect in life and sometimes we have to just take what we are given when it comes to life.
Sometimes it may feel like we are having eye opening thoughts at the strangest of times, but it may just be that those are the times when we are most open to figuring ourselves out or open to the influence of those around us. We don’t just have realizations when we want them, but more of when we are ready to receive them. Although sometimes we may be looking for an answer and when it comes to us we do not realize that that was the answer we were searching for until we are reflecting upon the experience sometime later in our lives.
While for a really long time I have known I do not like making a lot of phone calls, it never dawned on me until this last year that I have anxiety over making certain kinds of phone calls. Being a mother I sometimes do not have a choice in the matter, but for the most part I prefer not to make phone calls. Then this new information just presented itself to me this last month as I said when I was having trouble falling asleep.
While I am not sure there really is a fix for this issue for myself or if I am even wanting to have it fixed. There are times when we get so comfortable with the way things are in life that going out of our way to change them can be so much more work than we need in life sometimes.
Let me know how you feel about dealing with phone calls or if you know of ways to help with anxiety over the phone calls that we have to make throughout life.
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